Between 4809 and 4905, I will probably pick 4809. 4809 has a traditional Patek look and is a very good dress watch.
For me, the design of 4905 is not that much refined and attractive.
Wathes with moon phases are in the lady's complicated watch catagory. Well, some ladies prefer more complicated pieces, while others (majority, I guess) not.
If you are buying a Patek for evening out or for formal events, I would recommend a time-only dress watch. If you want to collect watches, I would recommend grand complications.
Lady's complicated watches are more expensive than time-only watches, yet not complicated enough for collecting purpose. In my opinion, somewhat "stuck in the middle."